Monday, March 22, 2004

Dear Judith Miller

Hello. My name is Akhsgkozzinata Star Syrup Yee Nee Hi-iiip Huzzah. I was very interested to read the following by the publisher of your newspaper.

Were her sources wrong? Absolutely. Her sources were wrong. And you know something? The administration was wrong. And when you're covering it from the inside like that you're going to get things wrong sometimes. So I don't blame Judy Miller for the lack of finding weapons of mass destruction.

I believe we can have a mutually beneficial relationship. I would like to be one of your sources, and I would like you to tell the readers of your newspaper what I have to say.

I am a being from another planet, and for the past 12 years I have been controlling the mind of the one you call Klyn-ton. I have made him do things to prepare the Earth for an invasion by us. He will do this by releasing a virus which will infect everyone on the planet, allowing my people to possess their bodies.

I look forward to reading about this in tomorrow's newspaper. If you write it up well, I will tell you even more tales about the Klyn-ton.