2. The Times needs to fire all its columnists except for William Safire and replace them with: Ann Coulter, George Will, Dinesh D'Souza, William Bennett, William Kristol, a black guy who is not Bob Herbert, and the ghost of Michael Kelly.
3. Except for the black guy who is not Bob Herbert, the Times needs to fire all its black employees immediately. As I've said in this space before, black people need to start their own newspapers.